Boredom leads to brownies
by therichnobody
Summary: Who ever would have thought Zexion of all people would get bored? Well, the virus of bored has reared its ugly head and has given Zexion the strangest of ideas. Too bad his idea backfires...slight OOC and a kiss scene that isn't really a kiss.


Another fic! So close to trinity!

-----X-------X-----

Zexion walked the hallways, feeling as drained of activity as ever. He didn't have anything to do, really. Too many heartless nuisances in the other worlds, and nothing he could do in the castle. So he decided to just sit in Lexaeus' room and hope that his friend could give him something to do. Walking into the rock-laden living space, he noticed that Lexaeus wasn't in here. He searched for his scent in the castle, and found him in the lower basement.

"Hmph, in the gym, working out. The stench of sweat and musk is all over him, " Zexion said to himself, walking over to the enormous book shelf and grabbing a random novel. "_Macbeth_, don't feel like reading that, _The War of the Worlds_, …no…_Iliad_…no..._Eragon_? Why would he have this?" And he continued to grab random books and toss them on the floor if it didn't interest him. He continued to throw the books even after he noticed Lexaeus entering.

"You need to go to Books-A-Million or something."

Lexaeus stared at the younger nobody, now succeeding in taking more than half of the novels off of the shelf. He just walked on into his bathroom and took a quick shower. When he came back, he found every book on the shelf scattered on the floor except one. A small orange-and-black hardback book, roughly 200 pages. Then he noticed that Zexion was lounging on top of the bookshelf like some sort of housecat.

"That's the only one I found interesting. _Thirsty_, authored by M.T. Anderson, about a teen slowly turning into a vampire and getting screwed over by this celestial being. You should read it sometime instead of the other crap." Stated Zexion in that bored monotone.

"You actually went through all of these books? What's gotten into you Zexion? I've never seen you so restless," Lexaeus said as he picked up a book but when he tried to put it back on the shelf, Zexion slapped the book out of his hand. They both watched it fall to the floor with a THUD.

"And what was that for?" the Silent Hero asked.

"Meh," Zexion shrugged. He rolled over on top of the bookshelf with his back turned to Lexaeus. So he tried again and the second book felt the same fate as the first.

"Are you going to keep hitting these books out of my hand?"

"Meh...nothing else to do...so yeah," Zexion replied, ready to hit another book if Lexaeus tried.

"Go ask the Superior for a mission."

"We aren't on good terms, and why waste effort on a senseless, unneeded mission?"

"Work out?" Lexaeus smiled sheepishly at Zexion's glare. "What about tormenting the lesser nobodies?"

"I already did that. And the greater nobodies, and heartless, and the..." Zexion trailed off. _I haven't tormented the islanders...Maybe that'll get rid of my boredom...But first a quick change, I think Lexaeus' must rubbed off me..._ And Zexion hopped off the bookcase, walking out of the room and thanking Lexaeus for the idea. The Silent Hero smiled, picked up a book in an attempt to clean up the mess Zexion made, only to have it slapped out of his hand again by a clone of the Cloaked Schemer he made before he left (disguised as a book-go figure)

-----X-------X-----

"I'll see you guys later, my mom wanted me to help with the redecorating," Kairi told her friends as she left for her home, leaving Sora, Riku and Wakka.

"Well, what now? We can't play Blitzball with three people." Wakka stated, bouncing the blue-and-white ball.

"Eh, Tidus and Selphie are gone to the 'library', if you get what I'm saying." Sora grinned. "I would have never guessed those two going out."

"Yeah, but this doesn't solve our current problem, but I got a better idea..." Riku replied, stealing the ball from Wakka and leading a game of Steal the Ball. At least this gave them something to do, eventually turning into Monkey in the Middle (guess who's the monkey) leading into sunset. The three teens lay there on the beach, staring at the olden ball of fire, until Sora's mom called him in and Wakka remembered his English homework. Riku sighed, getting up and heading for home.

"Guess I'll go ahead and turn in myself."

Upon reaching his room, he sensed something wasn't right. There was another scent in his room, and it wasn't his mother or dog. A nobody. More defined, Zexion. But why in the heck was Zexion in his room? Riku cautiously opened his door, half summoning his keyblade, half readying a dark aura blast. And there he was, sitting on his bed, was Zexion, but he was wearing different clothes. A simple black T-shirt with black long arm socks and black stone-washed jeans, ending the outfit with black-and-silver Timberland boots. But there was an accessory that Riku noticed Zexion was wearing. A spiked dog collar that had a long chain hanging from it and connecting to another spiked collar around his wrist. Riku already had his keyblade out and a charged blast in his hand at ready, but as usual, Zexion didn't noticed.

"Why are you wearing that?" Riku asked, still trying to realize Zexion out of his usual cloak.

"A person can't change up? You seem to do it often, why can't I?"

"It's just...unusual...and"-

"Unexpected?" Zexion interrupted. "Hmph, you know, staring is impolite."

That snapped Riku out of his glazed look and reminded him that a nobody was in his room. "What do you think you're doing, Zexion?!"

"About to annoy the hell out of you." he sneered, pulling out a small, rectangular white item. Riku caught the scent before he finished unwrapping it.

"Z-Zexion, what is that...a-a-a"-

"A brownie, why yes it is. It seems your senses have improved, Riku." Zexion stated as he broke off a piece. "Want some? It has little pieces of walnuts on it."

"Get that out of here! I...I can't have any..." he replied, looking away and wincing when Zexion placed the piece in his mouth. He was using all of his will power just to keep himself from snatching the chocolate from Zexion's hands.

"Why can't you have any? Allergic to walnuts?" he asked, placing another piece in his mouth, letting it rest halway out of his mouth. Walking up to Riku, he swiftly turned him around, showing where he had his piece. He almost went for it, _almost_-ALMOST! But instead he pushed Zexion back, trying to get as much space between him as possible. Zexion was now smiling, slowly sliding the piece in his mouth and licking his lips, walking back to Riku.

"I thought you _loved_ chocolate? What? Don't like mine? Want me to give you a piece _not_ in my mouth?" he asked, braking off a huge chunk this time, handing it to the silver-haired one. Riku looked at it hungrily, he wanted it badly. Being depraved of something for months on end can cause a man to forget why he can't have said thing. In Riku's case, this happened. He reached for it, barely touching it before it found it in that nobody's mouth.

He snapped. Tackling Zexion, he situated his legs, locking down Zexion's and forcefully locked the schemer in a tongue fight for the brownie. They wrestled, Zexion bucking in hopes of getting Riku off of him, but he was planted in that spot. He wasn't expecting Riku to go that far. All he wanted was for him to lust for it so badly he'd do whatever Zexon asked to get it. He was hoping to set him off in a hyperactive sugar rush and leave as quickly as he came. But now he was in a fierce tongue tustle with the teen, who is now sucking his face furiously trying to get every little morsel, no matter how saturated in saliva. He finished, now grappling with his hand that held the rest of it. Feeling the pressure lift off, Zexion teleported to the other side of the room but had to quickly jump on the shelf to avoid the charging teen.

"Give me the rest of it Zexion, and I won't have to hurt you," Riku said in a poisonous tone, glaring up at Zexion, who was too busy catching his breath.

"You're nuts! I'm not giving this to you-" 

"Shove it, you wanted me to do that, now give it here!" he yelled jumping at him but missed.

"Wait until I get down or I'll eat it right here," he smirked, seeing the expression on Riku's face change rapidily.

"You don't have to do that, I'll wait." Riku backed up uneasily, nervously eyeing the last bit of brownie in Zexion's hand. He watched it move as Zexion slowly got off of the shelf and back up to the other end of the room.

Zexion saw Riku tense up and twitch, taking a step towards him. He quickly raised the piece to his mouth and yelled "Back up! I'll toss it to you, just stay there." Riku stopped. Zexion ate it. Riku didn't go for a kiss this time. He flung so many dark aura blasts they melded into this uber immense aura bomb that imploded on the nobody, sending him through the wall. Zexion took that chance to flee, especially when he saw Riku flying towards him, keyblade swinging wildly and foaming at the mouth. He teleported back to Lexaeus' room, landing on the bookshelf, battered and broken(it was an awful large blast). Lexaeus was in his room, finishing the last page of the book _Thirsty_.

"What happened, Zexion?"

"Unnnhhhhh..."

He laughed, getting up to place the book back on the shelf but Zexion jumped on him with cat-like reflexes when his door blew off. And there was Riku, standing in the doorway, pointing his keyblade at Zexion, eye twitching violently.

"Where is it nobody?! I KNOW YOU HAVE MORE!! I SMELLED IT ON YOU!!!"(trinity!)

"I don't have anymore, you saw me eat the rest of it! Leave me be!" Zexion yelled from behind Lexaeus but that didn't stop Riku from advancing, which caused Zexion to start throwing book after book at Riku, who just sliced them indefinetely. Zexion grabbed for another one, but only felt air. He screamed (and a girly scream at that), running behind Lexaeus again, who was ready to defend. Riku was about to attack, but dropped his keyblade and started to smell the air. He sniffed again, and slowly turned around. He saw Roxas, walking by in the hallway, licking a chocolate ice cream cone with fudge sauce on top.

"Man, nothing beats coming back from heartless bashing than to relax with some ice cream!" he licked on, not noticing the potential threat walking behind him. Riku was stalking him like prey, and didn't strike until they rounded the corner. Lexaeus and Zexion heard the poor nobody's scream and Riku's snarl, sending a shiver down both of their spine.

Zexion collasped on Lexaeus' bed and sighed, "Glad that wasn't me, mind you I did get blasted with a aura bomb. Well that didn't go my way. What did you do?"

"Read the story you recommened. And yes, it was an okay story."

"See? That's the only book that deserves to be on your shelf. Toss the other ones."

Lexaeus looked around at the ripped, mangled, destroyed pages of books past scattered across his room. He sighed and started to pick up the paper, not expecting Zexion to help. He stood back up, hands full of sheets, and saw Zexion sweeping.

"Trust me, it's more efficient this way."

"What, so you can put it all under the rug?" 

"Exactly."

Lexaeus laughed. Zexion cracked a small smile. Riku got his chocolate, and the Organization had a job getting him to calm down, finally knocking him out via Roxas' boot.

----X-------X-----

Didn't mean for this to be this long. Oh well. I keep you guessing, as my art teacher said today, "(my first name) You keep suprising me."

If you thought this was going to turn into a yaoi, say so in your review.

If you was expecting something else to happen, say so in your review.

I wanna know how many people though it was a yaoi.

So, review please! (trinity!)


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